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Kaylee: Okay, then. Cow.
Simon: And I'm out twelve bits. I really know how to show a girl a...disgusting time.
Wash: Oh my god, it's grotesque! Oh, and there's something in a jar.
Simon: This may come as a shock, but I'm actually not very good at talking to girls.
Zoe: Why, is there someone you are good at talking to?
Inara: The Lassiter is universally known, Mal. Fencing it has to be like...like fencing the Mona Lisa.
Mal: The Mona Who?
River: My food is troublesome.
Jayne: Girl's a mind-readin' genius, can't figure out how to eat an ice-planet.
Jayne: (of his new hat) How's it sit? Pretty cunning, don'tchya think?
Kaylee: I think it's the sweetest hat ever.
Book: Makes a statement.
Jayne: Yeah, yeah!
Wash: A man walks down the street in that hat, people know he's not afraid of anything.
Jayne: Damn straight.
Mal: Oh! That was bracing. They don't like it when you shoot at them. I worked that out myself.
Mal: Everybody dies, Tracey. Someone's carrying a bullet for you right now, doesn't even know it. The trick is to die of old age before it finds you.
Jayne: Don't figure the percentage in that.
Mal: Don't strain your brain trying, then. Might break something.
Wash: Police procedure has changed since I was little.
Mal: They call back, you keep them occupied.
Wash: What do I do, shadow puppets?
Tracey: He was cuttin' on me, Sarge!
Mal: I know it! I told him to!
Tracey: You told him to! What for?!
Mal: You were dead!
Tracey: Hunh? Oh. Right. Suppose I was.
Mal: Alright. Now you care to explain why it is you got yourself all corpseified and mailed to me?
Mal: What about runnin'?
Wash: We tried that, remember? That's why we're here? In this glacier? 'Bout to be buried alive?
Tracey: 'When you can't run anymore, you crawl... and when you can't do that--'
Zoe: 'You find someone... to carry you.'
Tracey: Guess I did, at that...